Divorce: Celebrate Your Successes Along the Way
We all tend to be good at finding every single little thing we haven’t done perfectly and going over in our minds how we might have done things better or differently. Our inner critic gets a lot of action and a lot of attention. When we’re going through a challenging life experience like divorce, this is often even more common.
So I’m giving you permission right now to quiet that inner voice that likes to find fault and criticize, and to make a point of acknowledging everything that you’re doing well. Look at what you’re accomplishing and where you’re making progress and give yourself credit for it.
Take some time at least once a week, and especially whenever you’re feeling down, and make a list of your successes. They can be big or small and they don’t have to be tangible. Maybe you held back when you were tempted to say something antagonistic to your spouse, maybe you had a great laugh yesterday with a friend, perhaps you read some helpful divorce support information or completed some paperwork you needed to take care of.
Whatever you’ve done that makes you feel good, gives you a sense of relief, or moves you the tiniest bit forward – celebrate it. Go ahead and pat yourself on the back for a job well done. For some of the bigger items or those that have the most meaning for you, actually have a celebration of some kind. You can celebrate alone, or with someone else. Just make it fun and meaningful because the point is to feel good about yourself and recognize that you really are making progress.
You can sing and dance in your living room, have your favorite meal, go out with a friend, get a massage, or whatever makes you feel special and appreciated.
It can also help to share your successes with others. Tell a close friend or relative who will be happy for you and celebrate with you. Feel free to share your successes here. Just leave a comment on this blog – I’d love to cheer you on!